SAYONARA 2020

By : Johnetta Cuff

Let’s give this year 2020 a farewell with love we are in the last month of this year and we are coming into the New Year of 2021 in less than 30 days. What did this year teach you? What have you learned about yourself? How has 2020 changed your life? This year has affected humanity this year and has ripped the band aid off to the issues we chose not to face and made us look in the mirror and change. It has caused emotions to rise to the surface so that we individually can face our fears and unconscious bias. In retrospect this year has been a blessing in disguise. This year has been a year of death not only physically but spiritually and it served its purpose to teach us the most important lesson in life we will learn and that is oneness and unconditional love.  We as humanity has been forced to put our foot in other people shoes and show compassion while others continue live in fear. This year our shadows came to surface and forced us to show compassion and to face our truths without further hesitation. This year has forced us to live in gratitude for the air that we breathe as we have seen a lot of people pass on this year not only from this pandemic but injustices that have been going on for years. This was our wake-up call that something needed to change, before this pandemic there were atrocities going on in the world and there still is but now, we can no longer say that we don’t see. We may not be able to have world peace and cure all atrocities but the one thing we can do is change ourselves and be true to ourselves. When we do this, we share this with the rest of the world and that’s for the highest good for everyone. We must help one another and realize when one of us is in pain and no one lends a hand it becomes a domino affect and that pain gets passed on. Let’s become more aware of what’s going on around us and lend a helping hand.

 This year has been heaven and hell for me and that’s something I created by the way I thought about each circumstance in the moment. This year showed me where I wasn’t taking control of my life and was playing victim. This year made me face my fears, forgive more, and truly learn to have faith that the Universe was for me and not against me. I had learned that I was courageous and that everything I needed was already within me and nothing outside of me could stop me from being an impactful force in my own and others’ lives.  Although I am ready for 2021, I release 2020 with major love and forgiveness. The cycle of fear in my life no longer holds me captive in my life. I’m in the process of having my heart cracked open and evolving my consciousness to elevate to a new life that I am cocreating despite all that has happened thus far. I now look at life differently and have set the intention and made a promise to always be true to myself and to empower my brothers and sister in any way that will uplift them to become self-actualized. We are all here for a reason and that’s to become our true selves and empower others in our own authentic way for others to do the same. Let’s release the judgements and the hate and start looking through the lens of love. It’s easier said than done but when it’s done you feel lighter and all the heaviness in your heart is released. This wasn’t a year to stop living but the year to strengthen your spirit and love yourself and others more. It’s all about love don’t allow anyone to tell you different. Love is your birthright you don’t need to earn it’s just given because you came from love you are love, the more you give it out the more its comebacks and that’s all everyone is truly searching for, but it starts with yourself first. Everything is energy so drive into 2021 with some fresh positive, loving, liberating energy. It’s all about love don’t let them tell you different, sayonara 2020.

12 Tips For Mastering You In Entrepreneurship

As an entrepreneur, and a student on this journey I have learned it all starts with the mind. The mind is all and the universe is mental a principle of mentalism. In this game of life, you are the creator of your reality. What you eat mentally, physically, and spiritually is key. Our realities are manifestations of what’s within. Everything you need is already within you so fighting yourself and running on old programs will affect every aspect of your life including your business.  The name of this game is Master Yourself. To master yourself you must connect to that divine power within in to align with the true you. The category of your industry doesn’t matter these are golden nuggets and to mastering you because in the end that’s really one of our biggest lessons on this journey. In this article, I will give you some tips and tools to guide you on your journey.

MASTERING YOU TOOLS

  1. Know Thy Self- You must know who you are so that you’re able to stand strong in your integrity and character. Know who you are so that you aren’t wavering when you get around others who may test your integrity you need to be able to cultivate the inner strength for you to stand strong on your own unique path.
  2. Self-Love, Self-Respect, Self Confidence– Love, respect, and confidence are the true gems to this life. Before we can love another, we must love ourselves, loving yourself during the good and so-called bad times. Respecting yourself is to acknowledge and like who you are and to have empathy and compassion for yourself and have healthy high regard about who you are as a person flaws and all. How are you talking to yourself? Are you taking time for yourself and practicing self-care? Are you taking the necessary action to create the life you want? That’s where the confidence takes place and you check in on your self-esteem. Why do you feel inadequate? Are you loyal to you? Are you putting too much time, energy, and value into people’s opinions or just overall to people who don’t matter in your life? Clear out the emotional baggage and clutter. You matter, your loved and you are great just choose to embody everything that you want to be.
  3. Spiritual Practice– This is key and should of been #1 but it’s here. Are you taking the timeout to go within and receive the inner messages to guide you? Are you meditating, praying, and just overall practicing your form of spiritual practice? Are you centered in your inner peace and grounded in your spiritual practice? Your true self is never judging you that’s your ego. Spiritual growth must be a priority because everything we need and create starts within. You must believe and have faith in yourself and that the higher power within you is always there to create the miracles, blessing, and gifts you couldn’t have even imagined.
  4. Reprogramming Your Mind–  Are you aware of your thoughts? Do you think negatively? Are you thinking constructively? What old programming are you operating on that is no longer serving you?  To play the game of life we must go through challenges and to get through them you must be mentally strong and know and believe that you are LIMITLESS. Focus on you and become the best version of yourself, everyone else is taken.
  5. Self-Discipline– This will show up in every aspect of your life. If you want to level up in all aspects of your life cultivate this skill and quality in your life period. No excuses. Self-control and will power are one of the keys to your success. When you don’t feel like it this is when this skill needs to be cultivated. You want success GO GET IT! Discipline those thoughts and don’t dwell on your shortcomings or the old. Discipline your emotions. Discipline your habits and mind. Master this skill and you will soar.
  6. Intuition- Know the difference between your intellect and intuition. Always use both but your inner guide will never steer you in the wrong direction. Quiet your mind and listen.
  7. Gratitude- This is a must! Be grateful for all you have and all that’s coming. Be grateful for the blessings and challenges. Challenges make you grow. Start inviting them and the game you will master. Keep a gratitude journal and write. Keep your blessings on paper and in your heart.
  8. Energy– Master your energy and become aware of how you show up and show out. Heal all the pains of the past and transmute, gear it towards what you want. Raise your vibration and be loving, compassionate, and empathetic and always have discernment. Value your energy and don’t waste it on people, places, and things that no longer serve you.
  9. Enjoy the Process & Smile- Life is too short and long not to enjoy. You must have a sense of humor in your life. Focus on the positive and spend time with the ones you love that’s what matters most in this journey, not the materials we obtain that’s just whip cream on top, not the whole pie.
  10. Risk- Take the risk to try again after failure…That’s the secret. Release perfectionism and allow yourself to fail and try. Some risk you can calculate and some you just must have faith and keep it pushing. Just get up like Onaga from Mortal Kombat and kick butt. Win the war but choose your battles wisely!
  11. Well-Being-Health is wealth. Take care of your self-mind, body, and soul. You are a spiritual being having a human experience. Take care of your avatar! You are what you eat so eat to nourish your body. Limit stress as well and pamper your avatar when needed. Holistically take care of you.
  12. WALK-IN PURPOSE– IT WILL NEVER BE EXACTLY WHAT YOU THOUGHT IT WOULD BE BUT YOU WILL HAVE SOMETHING BIGGER THAN YOURSELF. LOVE WHAT YOU DO, BE CREATIVE, AND COMMITTED! RUN YOUR OWN RACE AT YOUR OWN PACE AND NEVER GIVE BEING A QUITTER AN OPTION!

These are just some of the master tools there are plenty more you and others may add because I can write a whole book but for the sake of this article, I shall digress. There are plenty of tools you can use but the key is to use them.

Be The Solution In Your Life And In The World! #InnerPeaceWithNetta#YouKnowWhat2Do!

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” I Am Compassionate”

Compassion towards myself has been one of the hardest lessons that I am still learning. Compassion for me didn’t come easy because I always thought something was wrong with me and felt I needed to be fixed or be someone else other than my true self. These emotions were deep-rooted inner child issues of abandonment, codependency, lack of boundaries amongst many others on the list of life lessons that I have endured during my life thus far.  In my childhood, I had experienced sexual trauma that took a toll on my life consciously and unconsciously. I no longer felt safe in my body and unconsciously created a persona to make me feel safe. It was hard for me to trust others and myself at such an early age. This persona became my defense mechanism and I carried this attitude that I would save and protect myself by not allowing anyone to get too close to me and if they were it was a codependent relationship. This later resulted in me building relationships as a teen and in my early twenties through trauma, codependent habits with family, friends, and romantic relationships.

It wasn’t until the year of 2012 where I started to become aware of a shift of awareness in my life. I was in a chapter in my life where my world was shaken up and my eyes became open to the pains that I had endured in my past and how I was carrying the trauma into my present life. This is what led me to my inner healing journey and spiritual awakening.  During my own inner healing journey, I have encountered many challenges about myself and the way I felt about myself on a physical and mental level. My self-talk was horrific, and it just made my self-esteem worse and it took a toll on my confidence. It’s been a long process of being a master onion and peeling back the layers to revive, refresh, and renew my life. It’s a constant process of compassionate self-introspection, forgiveness, letting go and unconditional love. Last year I faced another blow to my self-esteem as I was sexually assaulted by someone I knew and trusted. It triggered me back to my childhood as I fought back and when the person didn’t stop, I stopped fighting. I left my body and put back on the mask of guilt, shame, and unworthiness. I repressed and suppressed my emotions as I did in childhood as if nothing happened. I blamed myself for everything that happened and lacked compassion for myself at that time. I would throw myself into work until I felt exhausted. I was in my head replaying the whole scene trying to react it out and fight back till the end, I guilted myself to the point I felt powerless for six months and didn’t say, or act on anything that would have had assisted me in my healing. I was angry, enraged, and scared. I felt humiliated, with an overwhelming fear of judgment and persecution if I said anything, or at least that’s what my mind was telling me.

I was even more embarrassed because as a coach and healer I knew that I had to do something even though I felt a piece of me was gone. I finally went to therapy and the authorities reclaim my power and start my healing process. I also decided to join a healing circle facilitated by my friend who is also a Shaman and when we would end the circle, she would say to me “Ms. Netta you need to love yourself harder and find yourself some compassion”. I would eventually get signs from the Universe such as yogi tea quotes on compassion and then one day I found an old sticky note that said “I Am Compassionate” that sign was more than a confirmation for me. Compassion is a must for our emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual health. Compassion is a necessity in this life to assist humanity to grow. When we cultivate compassion, we are honoring not only individually but collectively. Lacking compassion for yourself will show up lacking compassion for others as well.  Compassion allows us to seize judgment, criticism, fear and hate that is projected on to others from within. As we rise above these actions that are birthed from fear and ignorance, we clear the space to experience our true selves and bask in our inner peace. Compassion for self can take a form such as passive which can entail a warm bubble bath with candles lit in the bathroom to the assertive form of expressing your emotions and speaking up for yourself without judgment. Compassion is giving yourself room to grow and being objective to those nasty thoughts made by that inner critic. Compassion for yourself is also standing up for yourself and saying “No”! Compassion goes hand in hand with self-love and self-respect. You must re-evaluate who and what in your life that may be inflicting harm on you and that can be self-imposed as well.

In my journey, I have cut ties with a lot of people, but I have also cut ties with my old self as. I was living as a person that no longer served a purpose in my life. I was living as this wounded child and it was taking a toll on every area of my life. My persona could no longer stay with me and I had to re-heal again and really face the parts of myself that I rejected that I thought were so-called bad and not good enough. I had to stop being my own worst critic and find the compassion to give to that wounded little girl what she needed to feel safe again. I now find every way to be compassionate even through self-discipline. I know I must give myself breaks and give myself time to write out my emotions, spend some time out but also do things for others as well that may be going through their own life challenges. The true lesson of all that I have been through is that “I am real power”. I had the power to change my life and still move forward and proceed to get support and forgive again. That was true power I forgave my perpetrator and I’ve learned to forgive myself because I did the best I could at that moment and realizing this truth for me was my first step to self-compassion. It has made tremendous shifts in my life and I have a different perspective on compassion and the role it plays in my life. Compassion is key to all forms of healing in this life. Compassion is also a state of constant forgiveness because you can empathize with people on their own journey no matter how unconscious they are about their own path in life. I’ve come to realize that even though the worst traumatic experiences in my life had nothing to do with me personally, it had everything to do with the other person and the lack of power, love, compassion, and how unconscious they were in their actions. We have all been unconscious to some or maybe all our actions but that doesn’t mean we won’t face the consequences. This is where higher learning plays its role of us learning the lessons that life has to teach us and instead of thinking life is against us it’s for us to teach us more about ourselves and the views of others. So when you think about compassion know that it is the gift of beauty we give to ourselves and others when we feel unworthy and this gift illuminates the darkness that we need to nourish with love from within.

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Learning To Love Myself

“How you love yourself is how you teach people to love you”. – Rupi Kaur

 

“I HATE YOU”! “I HATE YOU”! Were the words that bellowed from the depths of my wounded inner child. She was tired of all the suppression and repression of how I truly felt about my life, who I was or at least who I thought I was. She was too through with me. She was hurt, she was angry and resented me for the way I treated her. I was tired of the way that I passively lived my life and how I was giving up on myself, dreams but most of all my purpose. The choices I was making were not progressive and damn sure didn’t add to my happiness. I was living life the way that I thought I was supposed to. I was living my life according to other people’s rules and I resented them and my self for a choice that I was making, I was making choices to create a persona that made everyone else comfortable. This persona was a seeker of validation because deep inside I didn’t feel good enough. I had gone through experiences in life that seemed to validate that for me.

“THE CHOICES I WAS MAKING WERE NOT PROGRESSIVE AND DAMN SURE DIDN’T ADD TO MY HAPPINESS”

I was holding on to past pains and packing them in a special box and would unlock it when the Divine would tell me to let go and forgive and my response was to look at all this that I’ve been through and you want me to love myself! This person? This young woman who has been told she was wasn’t good enough, she was ugly, she wasn’t going to make it, she didn’t have what it takes to fulfill her dreams the same one who has had her heart stomped on in relationships. Yeah, all of that came up with my conversation with the Divine. I was going off on the Divine! I kept telling myself “I hate you and how all of my pain was for nothing. I couldn’t figure out what was it about myself that I needed to love. I was in my mind space that no longer served me, but I never understood how to release it with LOVE instead of JUDGEMENT! I’ve been judging myself all my life it was a habit I formed since childhood I never knew how to not criticize myself or judge myself. The Divine told me to release the self-hate. I felt as if I was dying inside because I wasn’t being true to myself. I wasn’t being honest with myself and I became sick of my own shit.

My inner child, she was to through because I allowed her voice to get lost, I ignored her when she said she wasn’t okay, ignored her when she told me she wasn’t comfortable in a situation, I ignored her when she told me she was hurting and I made her endure more unnecessary pain because I wanted to make everyone else feel good and happy because as long as everyone else was happy “ I was good”! “OH BOY”, here comes the cups filled with lies and distortions that will numb the pain of me not operating at my full potential. The lies of me not being enough until someone told me I was or validated what I was doing. These deep-seated lies were being purged from my eternal essence because the ultimate truth is I AM WORTHY! I was born worthy, it was an innate gift I was born with that was never to be measured by someone else’s values and beliefs. I am the only one who can measure my worth by how I think, feel, and act when it comes to myself. I had to learn and practice to feel the love from within and not look for the external forces to give me the green light for me to love myself. I can think highly of myself in a sense of being confident and looking at myself the way the Divine sees me because I am Divine myself. I act in ways that are loving to myself and not only self-care such as exercise, rest, grooming and the fun things but also when things get hard and I don’t feel or look my best, crossing those things off my list that I fear, self-discipline, acting on those dreams and goals, speaking up for myself, creating healthy boundaries, cutting off those people, places and things that no longer served me with love because they no longer served a purpose in my life.

Self-love is being committed to yourself no matter who, what, when, and how. Loving yourself flaws and all because you were made from perfection and there is nothing in this world that can alter that. Loving yourself is being your true self and standing up and fighting for yourself even when the majority is against you. Loving yourself when it gets rough because at the end of the day you start with you, and you will end with you so love it all.  Loving yourself also determines how others treat and love you. If you don’t love yourself then you will attract that energy to you, and you will go through a lesson to teach you that lesson to love yourself in whatever area that may be. Everything starts from within and that also includes love, we must bask in this eternal love so that we attract those who do the same. Love doesn’t mean perfection and it comes with its challenges, but it is worth it because it makes you grow and mature into someone you couldn’t have even imagined. Loving yourself is being true to you and that inner being who sees you in its image so why not love yourself? Unconditional radical love is key for the change that we want to see in the world because it starts with us, once you make this change within you will start to see it in your reality.

 

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Changes

Unavoidable, Beautiful, An Upheaval for some Very necessary for everyone. You are no longer comfortable, but you have everything you envisioned. You shine bright no longer dimming your lights. You find your path and you walk with inner peace. Your inner strength is solid and so is your foundation. Change not nickels and dimes but a beautiful valuable timeless gift.

8 Essential Tools For Healing On Your Self- Realization Journey

    1. Compassionate self – introspection Find your true purpose, essence, and fundamentals of your nature in an unconditional loving way. Unlearn what you learned and remember who you are by aligning with your higher self. Know who you are so no one else can tell you otherwise. Challenge your beliefs about yourself and others. Is there unfinished healing between you and your parents. What limiting beliefs did you inherit about life, money, survival, sex, relationships, boundaries, love, etc. We all make mistakes just re-evaluate the role you played and learn from it and release it. If it is something from childhood forgive your parents or caregiver. they did the best they knew how, and it was taught to them or a habit formed from their own issues. Do some deep soul healing and the answers will appear like magic!
 
    1. Meditation- A practice tool to go to your sacred space of inner peace and open the channels to your higher self without EGO or Intellect. This is where your higher self will give you the answers you’ve been searching for. Start with 5mins and be consistent. There are many meditations to find the one for you. Also, try to quiet your mind let the thoughts flow but focus on your breath. Staring at a candle flame to center your mind is a great beginner meditation. The more consistent the longer your meditations. 20-30mins a day is enough when you get to that time length. Make time for your meditation!
 
    1. Breath- Pay attention to how your body sensations feel when you breathe. Focus on inhaling and exhaling for 5mins in a quiet space, nature, shower, on the toilet, anywhere you can find 5mins of peace. This is key for meditation as well.
 
    1. Journaling/Creative Writing- Journaling every day is a great tool. I love to write myself, but it must be consistent. Buy a notebook specifically for journaling/ creative writing. A regular composition notebook is all you need or create one with a binder. Get creative name the notebook and go there to pour out your emotions also express your gratitude for all that you have and all that is coming to you. You may eventually write a book, poetry, songs, a movie 😊😊…. All things are possible! You only limit yourself with your beliefs!
 
    1. Exercise  This is key for the mind, body, and soul. Exercise comes in many forms. It doesn’t have to be intense, but you must move your body daily. Get a hula hoop, belly dance, pole dance, dance period, yoga, Pilates, cardio, weights, calisthenics, there are couch exercises seriously move your body and sweat. When you look good you feel good!
 
    1. Patience Have patience with yourself on this self-healing journey. Time heals all wounds. While the wound is healing don’t pick at it, nurture your wounds until they fully heal. Some wounds heal quicker than others. Be patient and consistent and committed to your wellbeing. Be selfless! Selflove, confidence is the foundation of how you live your life and how others treat you. Know your worth and never devalue yourself.
 
    1. Change yourself only!- Please do not try to change anyone else they have to save themselves. You can always help and guide but changing someone is spiritually immoral. This is self-healing, not you and your entourage. When you heal others will follow suit on their own time or they will be removed from your life. You will notice the difference in your reality and your perception will drastically change.
 
    1. HAVE FUN– The healing process won’t always be good times but it’s your catalyst to your internal happiness and divine love and there is nothing greater than that!

Master Onion aka Alchemist

I am making a conscious effort to be bold, be courageous on my inner healing journey. I am on the path to becoming a master onion aka alchemist. My journey has been painful, liberating, hard, fun, and rewarding. I have become an onion as I peel back the layers and rediscover myself. I’m on my quest and speaking my truth and owning it. FIRST LAYER: I look in the mirror as I stare into my soul, I’m on the quest to live my truth and be authentic but wait, here comes that shadow that used to hide under my bed as a child and scare me to sleep. The one that instilled anger in my heart, the same shadow that replayed the pain, betrayal, negative thoughts, unworthiness, lack of self-love, self-sabotage, self-hate, worry, guilt and resentment that manifested in my life at one time or another but NO MORE. SECOND LAYER: This time I AM AWAKE, I AM AWARE, I AM COMMITTED, I AM GROWING, I AM HONORING MYSELF and acknowledging my emotions and validating myself. I became accountable for myself 100%. I now step up and stand up for myself. I got work to do! THIRD LAYER: Well Damn! This layer has Niagara Falls streaming out of my soul portal it’s all healing and releasing I face my past pains that were triggered. You know all the trauma and dysfunction we claim as normal and suppress or repress. The hush secrets of generational cycles of sexual trauma, neglect, abandonment, abuse, toxic relationships, SOUL death, and codependency, damn this layer is thick but I break this cycle. I choose to stay awake there is no turning back. I hear and feel my ancestors and spirit cheering me on. They are my dream team within. They told me “you get stuck you rot” or you heal and grow, choose wisely”! Fourth Layer: This is when you make the choice. Walk-in Love or Fear? It’s only room for one. Which do I choose? Which will you choose?  Well, fear will replay the pains of the past as love will set you free from it. I choose LOVE! I need it to heal and share with others. Love is the way. Loving me 100% including my shadow. I go within as everything I’ve ever needed is already within me, like an onion the nutrients, juices, and flavor are within but you must pull back the layers. I advise everyone to go on your own quest to your authentic self that’s where you connect with the Divine within. It’s all about love don’t let anyone tell you different, continue your quest, and become the master onion. Become the best version of you follow your inner guide and heart. Fifth Layer, Notice! Here’s a notice, this quest is continuous there are just higher levels, people will come and go but most of all you will have the ones that appreciate you when you do the inner work of healing and exploring. New you, new crew, new life. We attract what we are so be what you want to attract. Be good to you and others will follow suit or fall off. Love you and all will follow or fall. Remember rejection is protection, your one step closer to what’s for you. Sixth Layer New lesson: Self-care, self-love, compassion, humility, creativity, inner strength, self-respect, unbreakable faith, honesty, balance, inner peace, harmony, forgiveness, commitment, resilience, perseverance, selflessness and detachment are just some of the keys of the journey, use them. Embrace you 100% always. Embrace giving and receiving, Reciprocity not transactional. Uplift others never break them down, be the master onion. Lead with your new life and new narrative change your story by living inside out never outside in. Reprogram your mental and surrender all thought you knew. March to the beat of your own drum. Transmute those wounds into wisdom. Be the master onion aka alchemist.

9 Questions To Elevate Your Self Love

These are some simple but soul-searching questions that will make you dig deep and really allow you to sit with yourself and explore your emotions, actions, and thoughts when it comes to yourself.

You are what you EAT (emotions, actions, thoughts) and that’s mind, body, and soul. What kind of energy are you feeding yourself? Is it in the name of unconditional love? So, sit with these questions without judgment and just become aware of compassion and kindness.

 

  1. Do you unconditionally love yourself?

Well, wouldn’t that be the first question you would have to ask yourself to improve self-love? But in all actuality, most people will say yes automatically because they are looking outside in instead of inside out. Now don’t get me wrong there are people who love themselves unconditionally and its from an internal factor but most people including myself in the beginning of my self-realization journey I was loving myself on factors outside of myself such as validation from, friends, family, career and what I looked like outside instead of internal virtues.

  1. Can you look in the mirror and tell yourself you unconditionally love yourself flaws and all?

 If it is too hard to say that you love yourself, then start by saying something that you like about yourself and go within even if it hurts to dig deep. This is your sacred time, energy to give to yourself and you’re worth it preferably naked if you can if not do it any way you can in the mirror and have fun with it. Start with one internal love a day and build it up as you go. If you need help sing your favorite LOVE song to yourself that uplifts your soul.

This was a hard one for me, the first time I did this I cried with my head down. My head was in my hands eventually. It pained me that I couldn’t stare into the seat of my own soul without the streams of Niagara Falls coming out of my eyes. I could hear the waves crashing against my eyelids and the hot streams rolling down my face. It got better as I started to do the internal work and breaking up the beliefs and habitual negative thinking within me. My self-esteem was shot but I was determined to operate at my infinite potential. The singing in the mirror built my confidence and soon a positive shift in my perception was happening.

  1. What does unconditionally loving yourself look like to you?

This question will vary from person to person, but everyone’s response should be healthy such as releasing toxic relationships, toxic habits, toxic mindsets, etc. You’re doing things that are healthy for you in mind, body, and spirit. It doesn’t have to be perfect but being in a relationship where you allow someone to disrespect you and tear you down is not loving yourself. Being in a career you hate is not loving yourself. Doing things, you don’t want to do, and I mean the things you don’t want to do because your getting the internal guidance to practice boundaries and do things from the heart. For me, it’s being able to speak up and being able to express myself unapologetically.

  1. How do you show this to yourself and others? (Emotions, Actions, Thoughts)

 For me it’s being able to speak up and being able to express myself unapologetically, it’s excepting all of me because I Am Whole! I own every aspect of my life and take accountability even when I’m being challenged because that’s the catalyst for growth. I respect my mind, body, and spirit, I also set healthy boundaries. This will also vary from person to person as well.

  1. Do you feel you deserve love?

This answer should be an automatic YES! Why because you came from love, love never has to be earned it is given. We live in a society where conditional love is practiced, and it is programmed in the media, communities, households, and self that if we only had a certain person, place, or thing or if we looked a certain way physically, we would then deserve love. I was guilty of this myself I allowed people to use me and treat me a certain way or I would over give so that they would see me and love me because I felt I had to prove I deserved their love. That is the worst feeling ever, but I was also the person who became jaded and also did the same thing and I became like the people who did the same thing to me until I learned that even if you get hurt and in life you will you must keep your heart open. Learn your lesson and take with you the wisdom but don’t ever allow hurt people to change you into someone you are not.

  1. What are your priorities in life?

Remember you are your biggest priority to assist you with your growth and becoming your true self you can only do that no one else can do that for you. This one was a big explosion for me. Since I could remember I was always helping other’s out since childhood but I never really did the things I wanted to do and if I did I felt it was wrong or selfish and then this developed into habits of being distracted by other people’s problem and life circumstances because somewhere deep inside I didn’t love myself to put me first even though I had these grandiose dreams and goals and knew deep down I was capable and willing to create my dreams but being distracted caused chaos, pain and a loss of time I couldn’t get back but I did learn those lessons. I had to learn to make myself a priority so that I could focus on my wellbeing and explore all aspects of myself. Every aspect of our lives should have a healthy balance as well.

     7. What do you love about your life? (Personal Checklist)

I think this one is plain and simple. What makes you wake up and feel empowered to make your mark in the world? Whew child, it took me a while to really see what I loved about my life and to be grateful for it but to also be honest where I could make changes where I wasn’t happy or didn’t love an aspect of my life. This is another deep-diving question as well.

  1. Do you love yourself enough to forgive yourself and others?

Forgiveness is the key to healing, growth, and just overall life. We have all been the hero and the villain at one point or another in our lives. Forgiveness is key because it’s for you and it teaches you maturity and humility. You must forgive yourself or it will KILL YOU! Read that again! If you don’t forgive yourself, it will KILL YOU! When I say KILL YOU, I mean internally because holding on will stagnate your life it will keep you in the situation and will replay repeatedly. So, let go. It’s hard to forgive yourself when you carry the baggage of guilt and shame. If you have done something that you know that wasn’t right, then you will have to deal with the consequences, but you must go through the process of forgiving yourself. Now forgiving others is also for you, holding on to heavy burdens in your heart, mind, and body will hold you back or KILL YOU! Don’t rent space to things you can’t change and shift your perception about what happens and remember there was a lesson to be learned whether it was at that time or down the road. I struggled with this as I use to hold on to past hurts and pains from childhood, but I had to learn that all things happen for a reason even if I don’t understand in the moment.

  1. Do you have adventure and excitement in your life?

What hobbies or creative ventures are you into that allows you to feel free and bring excitement into our lives. This is key to a beautiful life as life is not all about work and to tap into creativity so that you are able to create the life you want from a place of joy, exploration, and inner peace. I have learned to try different things out of my comfort zone such as taking myself to Costa Rica as a gift on a whim and loving it. It was Pura Vida!